Whiny Bitch Survival Kit
This gift set arms you with the necessary equiptment to form a happiness shield to deflect whiny bitches. Unfortunately, whiny bitches do exist. They come in all shapes, sizes, & genders. They can be found everywhere, but mainly during errands, at home, & especially at work! The most effective way to cope with a whiny bitch is to...
1.) Pour a large glass of your favorite wine into the snarky wine glass from the enclosed box.
2.) Enter bathroom with wine bottle and prefilled glass, close and lock the door, and run a bath.
3.) Refill glass, insert Magic Whine Mufflers (one in each ear).
4.) Hang your Haggard Ass Sachet on bathtub spout (follow essential oil directions), or toss in your Ass Bomb.
5.) Slip into tub with wine glass in hand and bottle within reach to create your happiness shield.
6.) Breathe and forget about the whiny bitch.
Box contains: (1) bar of Whiny Bitch Moscato Rose soap, (1) snarkely etched wine glass, either a Whiny Bitch Haggard Ass Sachet or Forget the Whiny Bitch Ass Bomb, & one pair of Magic Whine Mufflers.
Soap Ingredients: Olive Oil, an unpalatable Moscato Rosé, Alkanet infused Almond Oil, Coconut Oil, Sodium Hydroxide, Shea Butter, Castor Oil, & Mango Butter. Essential Oils of: Rose Absolute, Frankincense, Palmarosa, & Lime.
Bath Bomb Ingredients: Sodium Bicarbonate, Citric Acid, Alkanet infused Sulfated Castor Oil, & essential oils of Rose, Frankincense, Palmarosa, & Lime,
Haggard Ass Ingredients: 10ml bottle of Whiny Bitch Essential Oil Blend (Rose Absolute, Frankincense, Palmarosa, & Lime) & XL Sea Salt Crystals.
Handmade in Woodstock, IL
*Colors and patterns may vary.
**Common sense tells me not to use dark naturally colored soaps with light colored washcloths or to allow the soap to sit in standing water. You should use this same thought process.
*** Drink responsibly people. Don't get piss drunk and become a whiny bitch yourself.